april sunlight

Sunglasses block the harsh sunlight yet it also allows us to peek at the generous amount of skin you're willing to offer us (something Montreal is renowned for, like it or not). There's a fine line in public decency when it comes to showing off skin, it's something I've pointed out to a couple of girls in the subway once when my eyes caught a glimpse of their incredibly apparent cleavage -- I got mean stares in return but they did not shy away from looking at my stomach as I lifted up my shirt; it's skin, what do you expect? Exposed skin or not, we do have a huge "pervert" problem in the city though... make a strong point that this is utterly unacceptable. There is very little respect, hence "peek" and "glimpse". We were outdoors at all times, soaking up the eerie positive vibes, the daytime/nighttime warmth -- all of us together healing I guess (or giving even less of a fuck than before).

pounding...

...from above us, at unreasonable hours makes for an awful wake-up signal. We handle it from all the right angles but it seems as though it's out of their hands. Fine then, it's in ours. At least, for a time, there was the respectful silence of what once was the tenants' home. Our newest nearby retreat has changed their administration and it is no longer as it was (for too short a time) even though the naked eye can't see the difference but I suppose that too will soon change. If it ain't broke... you know. Maybe it had to become something else so that it would be one less thing miss out on. And the above pounding persists, not unlike the defamation of a nearby sanctuary transformed into a view-blocking condo building and its construction noises so close in proximity that the echoes still shake local eardrums to this day. Quiet nights ahead.

sept! dix!

June 2007 will mark the 10th anniversary of our graduation from high school and our fellow ex-classmates have started to gather up everybody's contact info for an upcoming reunion. Contacts keep coming in, long lost friends are found and many souvenirs along with them. I'm surprisingly enthusiastic about it! There's a lot of people I can't wait to catch up with (given that someone might be generous enough to organize the damn thing to begin with) and of course many I'm not too eager to see but that goes both ways, it's normal. It's not as relevant as it was back then anyway, there's this general clean slate feeling going 'round and that's a welcomed vibe. 1997 was still sorta early in the "internet age" (and I can't help but wonder how easier any research assignments would've been if I had access to google back then, damn I'm old) so no one really exchanged any emails or websites back then but here I am today adding tons of old contacts on my various messengers thinking "wow, he/she's online!" and everything/everyone is that much more accessible now. It's very odd but it's lots of fun. I made a pact with a close friend of mine (who's also part of this reunion) that we would make an effort to go out of our "clique" circles (or comfort zones, if you will) and try to catch up with people we weren't that close to back in the day. Aside from reuninting with ex-friends, it seems kinda pointless to experience a gathering if you're not gonna (re)discover faces from the past. At the time this reunion should take place, I'll be closer to where I was ten years ago as well. There was a time when I could vent that I "made it", in the sense that I don't necessarily have a job per say but I still manage to pay the bills (this is still true) -- it's one hell of a (self-appointed) roller coaster (I'm in one steep slump right now) and it hasn't always been easy (you won't really know what it's like 'til you've tried it, as one my friends recently found out) but it has ALWAYS been rewarding. I'm just not certain if I can claim "victory" anymore. I have to weigh it out when I get back there, keep the eye on the prize (a plan I can't wait to work on). So by then, I'll be hand-in-hand with several different reunions -- they keep saying that time flew by real fast but I don't think so, the pacing seems perfect from my perspective.

crowd

Saw Placebo a few nights ago, a very nice/generous show (special nod to the band for addressing the crowd in french, and not just an "allo" either). My friend brought me to see Massive Attack last year so it was my turn to treat her to a show and she's a longtime Placebo fan so that was an obvious choice... the thing is that I didn't know much about the band (though we were compared to them on many many occasions) and I've only heard a couple of songs prior to seeing them live but it was kinda nice to go see a major act with little knowledge of the band and nothing to expect beforehand. I think I get where the comparisons came from; this is the kind of band that you love or hate, no in-betweens. The only real downside was the crowd. I know it seems as though it shouldn't matter but it does (it so does). Some artists will attract a specific type of crowd (one where you almost feel as though you could connect with practically anyone in the room) while other artists have more of a widespread appeal; those are the ones you have to watch out for. For instance, a Radiohead crowd can (almost) ruin a show but I doubt that a Portishead crowd ever could (and yes, I've been to both, many times). I'm not saying "don't go see Radiohead" -- that's dense, but if you see em' in Montreal ('cause see, it depends on the countries and areas too) well you gotta expect some moron to talk or scream while Yorke's trying to do some quiet notes on the piano (though the rule excludes outdoor shows and festivals, that is to be expected -- and allow me to contradict myself even further by stating Radiohead did defy the rule here in Montreal, outdoors at that, in 2001 where they successfully got the whole island to quiet down -- but goddamn, that's rare). Soooo the crowd at Placebo really got on our nerves (I'm not that much of a violent person but I felt like assaulting a few on that night) -- it was distracting but it wasn't enough to ruin the experience. The last ideal crowd I've witnessed was at the solo Cat Power gig and that was a while ago. You see, you can be loud and noisy at home while listening to the music too -- that's why they record albums.

erase

You can start over too.

h/e 162 march

March change / April rain | colder monotonous forecasts / originally written on March 31st 2007 - edited on the post date | It's happening fast and I don't see it coming (for what it is). A widespread effect with possible long-term concequences and an exile that should will prove to be beneficial through perseverance and adjustment. Although some ties may be impetouously cut -- it is in no way a permanent severance. Adjusting to the new characters and chapters initiated by an authority that will instantly lose all dominance once the new book begins. Distant locations not distant memories.