mend

Aging badly and planning nothing for the ol' birthday. It's a first in a long while actually, but then again, 2007 is all about different firsts (and certain lasts) and thus all proceeds according to plan. How lovely. "Oh you must take yourself too seriously..." and yes, maybe that's the case, maybe not or maybe I don't see it as such a bad thing either! Consider the opposite... Try as I might to be defined by my own actions and decisions, it rarely occurs, but I try whereas being intentionally defined by the opposite, in my opinon, is an ultimately negative result of one's lack of confidence and self-esteem, hence the lenghty (though beneficial) autoanalytical posts shown here on this black and white web space. So, mis à part the comparisons (facile), I forsee two solutions here; first off, we could further dissect and discuss my perspective or secondly (no offense, sorta), you could go read something else entirely. You know, glass houses and whatnot. And the need to justify husk/essem remains and it'll probably show its ugly head from time to time but there will should be soft glimpses in between for those of you (including myself) keeping score. À Mars.

nul si découvert

Ok you can stop now (spiders?).

I fought the law and Loto-Québec won

The staff locked the doors, regulars standing at the bar, drinks in hand -- the ashtrays came out and we all lit up a cigarette at the bar. Like it used to be. I was right about the Casino, they still have illegal smoking sections, I'm also not supposed to type Loto-Québec correctly but it's part of an agenda and you have more things to worry about at the moment. It was amazing.

new post / click / type

Old Blogger? Old Blogger? The hell is an Old Blogger account? Have you seen the New Blogger accounts with those impossibly un-even top nav bars? The mixed-cap type? The archive scroll down arrows? I'm all for giving Blogger its signature but you gotta fix that up before I make the switch, hopefully I'll never have to either (but it'll be imposed eventually). I don't need a Gmail either, thank you very much. "New" isn't necessarily better. I'm waiting on phone calls / despite what my clients might think, corrections lead to further errors. I've been catching lots of heat for bad coordination lately, I can handle the blame, when I'm really responsible / I am not / no time to argue, get it done / off on the ol' shoulders and get it done / My friend is going to analyze a call with her boss in which she was apparently rude to a client (or a collegue, I don't recall) / I understand the policy to take a deeper look into these things but it's the outcome that would drive me mad / it's the common sense myth I was talking about, and then there's lots of abuse, and it has so much power / a man wearing a turban at the border is checking my papers for my re-entry into the country, it irks me, I admit it / I don't know where to go, we have to leave / we're being evicted in July but it started years ago / no more the pitter patter of hints and strategic second guessing, two anerving years of uncertainty / in one fell swoop and you're out / I believe these things lead to equal concequences, but parts of the game are still on, so focus / so focus you stupid fuck / how's this for change? it's impressive, thanks (more on that later -- yes, way more) / homeless guy asks me for money, claims he's hungry, I hand him over my biscotti cookies and he refuses them / girl walks by me and coughs to indicate that my smoking bothers her (which is impossible for I am a respectful smoker and I never blow smoke in people's faces), we were on St-Laurent during rush hour so I screamed out to her "careful! car! car!!! surely that bothers you too?" / frowning girls usually don't get good sex, sorry, I'm allowed this type of comment every now and then / coffee's getting cold and I'm loosing steam, end it on a powerful dramatic note: ... damn it.

re: Souffle Acoustique 01

There's an awful lot to manage in the weeks before any show, it'll be a high or a low depending on how well it went and then it'll be over fast and life goes on with one less preoccupation. It shoots you down abruptly every single time. It went well and we were pleased (so you end up with a bit of a high in the following week). I couldn't spend as much time with everyone as I would've liked to but that's to be expected (but it always makes me sad). One band ignored the "acoustic" criteria and made a mess of the whole theme, I have a hard time understanding it not to mention that it was then almost impossible to quiet down the crowd for the following act -- mine... but I didn't dwell on it, stepped up and did my thing before our time ran out (and we understood what they meant by that immediately after). No fowl for the venue nor its owners, they were top notch and we had been warned. My friend's father came up to me with a sincere surprised look on his face and compared me to Leonard Cohen in his early years -- there's no better compliment. Thanks to everyone who dropped by, on to the next one.

like an extension

We were very few to witness the glory that was Earl Greyhound last night at the Green Room (lucky us, indeed), a block away from Bar St-Laurent 2 where we'll be playing tomorrow. After being floored by such an amount of soulful rock, you can't help but want to "rock out" as well -- but it's acoustics on the menu tomorrow night and judging by the condition of my guitar after the last acoustic show, it'll be anything but rockin' unfortunately... The game plan so far is that I'll play an acoustic rendition of the Le Soir track "dramatic" (which, by the way, is scheduled to be mastered by the one and only Bob Ludwig thanks to P*co's beautiful electronics) accompanied by I*a on cello. The two following tunes have yet to be titled, they just might end up being called 01 & 02 as they are titled now 'cause the two go hand in hand as an outdoor/indoor themed combination (somewhat erotic actually) but I might add my take on Nina Simone's "Since I fell" as an intro to 02... you see, I'm just thinking out loud but it is important to me. The real challenge lies in accomplishing these songs as sober as one can be in those late hours.

150107

So this is the front porch view, same as the living room view (through large antique windows). A while back, when we lost the view from the back (and the yard itself), I managed to find solace in this view but it occurs to me now that they did find a way to take this one away from us as well. Ah que sera, sera... the quote reminds me of "Let it Be" -- why the hell should you let anything be? My mother was right, she never agreed to that and neither do I (though we have nothing but respect for its author). I'll post the address when we're finally evicted so that you fellow Montrealers can go and see what all the "fuss" was about (I know, I know... the picture(s) is probably sufficient enough of a reference for anyone to figure it out). I've had my share of countless freaks knockin' on the ol' door anyway, from religious fanatics to a nervous middle-aged Billy Corgan fan and everything in between (sorry if you read this and take offense, though I did my best to help you, your presence left me ill at ease in my own home -- peace). I've only been a resident of the charming piccola italia for eight or nine years now (and one of its frequent visitors for some 15 years) but I've noticed much change and tension. There's increasing hostility in the area and racism debates are resurfacing fast (the modern trojan horse et al). Sensitive issues to be sure, it can get very confusing especially when we're all tongue tied in political correctness but we needn't look any further than the Supreme Court of Canada's decision on the k*rpan being worn in schools (or anywhere else for that matter), common sense is simply non-existent anymore. End of argument... censored out of fear for religious retaliation? Works, doesn't it -- especially seeing as how I am absolutely vocal about my aversion for Québec Catholics and Christians -- go "figure". I won't judge a book by its' cover (I "try" not to), but there are some areas where I'll draw the line, foreigner or not. Was that fair? Yes if you consider that those who generally ruin it for all the others never stop to think wether it is fair or not. Now you may go ahead and label me an individualist or a racist (et ça va me passer rapidement au-dessus de la tête) but as long as my family and friends are alright and that I can hand out a few positive gestures here and there, I'll be fine. Time to step outside and take it all in once more.

recongnize

Following up on this post, an interesting quote that you should be hearing more often (sent to me by P**): -- « Je crois sincèrement que des icônes comme Robert Charlebois ou Jean Leloup ont un devoir de rigueur intellectuelle plus grand à l'égard de toute cette nouvelle génération et je les invite à se pencher sur les textes des Vulgaires Machins ou de la Cage de bruits. » -- What else can I add to this other than "fuckin' a". The rest of the article here.

duplicity [03]

fucked by my own duplicity | Much like the same trials over art/safe, here's beauty vs. novelty. Let it linger, attack later.

false break

Akk -- it's me. I'm not that vain (seriously, look at me), I'm just a Photoshop pro. Human figures in rich black and white have always been seriously lacking from this page (especially female curves, aesthetically speaking -- sorta) but that's the price I pay for privacy. So here I am! Gin in hand at what I often refer to as one of our second homes [right here]. I like the semi-revealing shots... Anyway, I had tons of drafts about how I've recently hit a wall or how I warped ahead in time to 2007 without any recuperation (whine whine whine) but I just couldn't get the right words to lay it all out correctly (while also writing huge paragraphs that would've needlessly justified negativity). So I just summed it up right here in a few short lines, but it is quite the ordeal and it is difficult, and not only for my part, which makes it that much harder. I wouldn't want to appear self-absorbed -- but fuck it, "it is in THIS body that I'm inclined to feel emotions" after all. You actually have to type this shit out sometimes just to be on the safe side... I've skipped September 2006 and I'll skip February 2007, my birthday month at that. I've always made a big deal out of my birthdays, with parties and whatnot, mostly 'cause it's so dead after the holidays that it always serves as a nice excuse for a get-together (so long as I remember em', that is). I don't know if I'll break tradition this year, I sure as hell kept it during worse periods of my life. I don't know. This is the kind of post that had many phrases that started with an "I", that's just amateur blogging... I apologize! You might want to keep an eye out for this.

134

starting to change / subject to change / easy play on words / well-wishers / shame on those who fail to recognize the value of a juggler

and then a breather